Look forward but always remember...

Attitude is an incredibly powerful thing. You might even say it is infectious. We watch people testify to the events of their lives on the news, share stories over lunch, and recollect at family dinners. I spent the last couple of years trying to figure out something someone had stated to me about the use of the word "normal".

I am sometimes prone to using the expression " That's normal" without considering the impact that phrase can have when it is my history producing that expression to another. We say " That's normal" to validate an awkward experience or break the loneliness that an experience can put upon a person. In my former profession it was easy to use this term alot when it came to validating someone's experience about disease and the challenges of moving back into life from disease. (Funny thing about the word DIS and EASE- Not at EASE). The benefits of using the expression has to be tempered to the right moments or else its impact loses meaning. To say that something is normal is to assume where a person comes from emotionally, intellectually, spiritually or physical is or has been other then normal.

Normal for me is different than it might be for you. Consider that to be an elder of your groups, we have to weigh carefully what is validated. Sometimes validation is the form of rubber stamping and doesn't allow a person to find their critical thought process of this experience. When we say something is "normal" it is in our norm not everyone elses, yet collectively we know commonality through experiences. I have had to remember to be careful to use this term around younger people. If I say "That's normal" I may be robbing them the opportunity to discover what is real for them. Maybe instead of saying " That's normal" in the future I will stop and ask "What does this experience mean for you?"

It is not in the norm of life that we construct our greatest achievements rather step off and soar through life to find our new experiences to share with others. Look forward in life with great anticipation but remember to look back, someone is paying attention to what you are saying.